Memphis
- Snow on the way tomorrow! Thats good I guess. I really wish that my car heater was working. Or that I wasn't too poor to fix it. If there is one really good thing about my situation living in borderline poverty trying everything I can to launch an educational and professional in a bad economy its that it has all but killed the sense of entitlement I entered school with. Jobs aren't given away. Neither are grad school positions. I can no longer earn things by skirting by with minimum amount of effort. I never struggled in school in school, not even in college, but now I'm learning theres more to success than mental aptitude and I hope that when someday I do finally break through that I never take it for granted. I hope I never forget how truely little I need to get by. I'm living fairly comfortably on 8 dollars an hour 25 hours a week. I hope am always grateful for a salary that pays the bills, a roof over my head, and food in belly.
- I'm hanging out with Brittany and Jeff tonight for the first time since I graduated. It'll be nice. There was a soothing feeling of being at home and happy during our Tuesday night excursions. They're just good people, the kind that can sit and talk for hours and never feel like any kind of step was lost. I do wish Julie was going to be there, probably not as much as her though. Poor girl, stuck down south with her student teaching.
- I choose a bad semester to ask for one of my letters of recommendation. She'll still get it for me but I know shes not going to have the time to make it as good as she made the last one. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me. Its kind of stressful because my letters are the one area of the application that I have little to no flexibility on. Well, it'll still work out. My main 'choice' schools have the later application dates which should serve to my advantage and won't cripple the whole process. Times running out though, slowly but surely. I hope it goes off smoothly. I won't lie I'm nervous.
- Otherwise I'm just hanging in there, making the most of things. I've been getting better, I can feel it. I think I underestimated the effect the events of this summer had on me and was too hard on myself when I wasn't ok right away but now that I'm relaxing a little more, prioritizing a little more effectively, and am closer to my goals, I'm coming through on the other side.
- So smile! Its gonna be ok.
- "I waited my whole life/just to see Mephis/Now all I can see/Is you"
- I'm hanging out with Brittany and Jeff tonight for the first time since I graduated. It'll be nice. There was a soothing feeling of being at home and happy during our Tuesday night excursions. They're just good people, the kind that can sit and talk for hours and never feel like any kind of step was lost. I do wish Julie was going to be there, probably not as much as her though. Poor girl, stuck down south with her student teaching.
- I choose a bad semester to ask for one of my letters of recommendation. She'll still get it for me but I know shes not going to have the time to make it as good as she made the last one. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me. Its kind of stressful because my letters are the one area of the application that I have little to no flexibility on. Well, it'll still work out. My main 'choice' schools have the later application dates which should serve to my advantage and won't cripple the whole process. Times running out though, slowly but surely. I hope it goes off smoothly. I won't lie I'm nervous.
- Otherwise I'm just hanging in there, making the most of things. I've been getting better, I can feel it. I think I underestimated the effect the events of this summer had on me and was too hard on myself when I wasn't ok right away but now that I'm relaxing a little more, prioritizing a little more effectively, and am closer to my goals, I'm coming through on the other side.
- So smile! Its gonna be ok.
- "I waited my whole life/just to see Mephis/Now all I can see/Is you"
posted by Jay | 5:06 PM
1 Comments:
You must write very quickly to have written all of that while one song played. My kingdom to not need to proof read. I love you babe.
Post a Comment
<< Home