Stories of assault and manipulation
- I think the people you are surrounded by have a profound impact on how you view the world. I'm trying not to let some of mine taint me too much.
- I had a 45 minute conversation today (more accurately I patiently listened to a 45 min rant) from one of my coworkers where I learned all kinds of things about my organization; specifically stories about my boss, my coworkers and some of the background of the place I work. The things she told me were frightening. If true, which I have no reason to believe they're not, I really need to learn to keep my head down. It was story after story of organizational politics, violence, childish inflexibilities, rampant selfishness and general nastiness.
- While the stories made me feel slightly vindicated in the way I've been treated at times since I've been there, I feel overall that listening to the rant could potentially have a very negative impact on me if I don't try and take them with a grain of salt. I need to remember that I haven't heard the other sides of the stories and not lend myself to an attitude of negativity. I've been far too prone to this attitude over the last months and it needs to stop. I'm gonna make it stop.
- In a piece of good news, I finally got a hold of Dr. Gibbons. I have a meeting with her on Friday to have her help me sort out my grad school process. That's a good positive step and will do numbers for helping me soldier through these last couple application steps. I'm excited about the potential to pursue my PhD. Its something that I value, that I want, and that I feel I need to at least try to feel I'm not settling in life for something less than what I'm capable. The pieces are falling into place but I'm doing my best not to get my hopes up yet. Its by no means a lock. Its looking good though.
- Till then...
- I had a 45 minute conversation today (more accurately I patiently listened to a 45 min rant) from one of my coworkers where I learned all kinds of things about my organization; specifically stories about my boss, my coworkers and some of the background of the place I work. The things she told me were frightening. If true, which I have no reason to believe they're not, I really need to learn to keep my head down. It was story after story of organizational politics, violence, childish inflexibilities, rampant selfishness and general nastiness.
- While the stories made me feel slightly vindicated in the way I've been treated at times since I've been there, I feel overall that listening to the rant could potentially have a very negative impact on me if I don't try and take them with a grain of salt. I need to remember that I haven't heard the other sides of the stories and not lend myself to an attitude of negativity. I've been far too prone to this attitude over the last months and it needs to stop. I'm gonna make it stop.
- In a piece of good news, I finally got a hold of Dr. Gibbons. I have a meeting with her on Friday to have her help me sort out my grad school process. That's a good positive step and will do numbers for helping me soldier through these last couple application steps. I'm excited about the potential to pursue my PhD. Its something that I value, that I want, and that I feel I need to at least try to feel I'm not settling in life for something less than what I'm capable. The pieces are falling into place but I'm doing my best not to get my hopes up yet. Its by no means a lock. Its looking good though.
- Till then...
posted by Jay | 8:37 PM
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