The Meaning of Life?
- My notebook journaling recently has been going great. There’s something cathartic in just writing down my thoughts exactly as they are unfiltered. It’s nice having those things recorded too. I've had a good time throughout my life going back and reading my old entries, especially the ones from that journal and reliving how things were back then. Its healthy for me too, those who don't study history are doomed to repeat it.
- I miss Kimbre a lot. She’s camping with her upward-bound kids in Rocky Mountain National Park. No cell phone service there but I got to talk to her when I got off of work while she was in town which was really nice. My count up clock on my desktop says that we've been dating 200 days today. There’s no particular meaning to this landmark beyond just putting in perspective how far we've come. Things are going good with her. I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time.
- I don't understand myself sometimes. I'm an awkward mix of a lot of seemingly contradictory things. Social nature with loner tendencies. Love of faith and love of science. Excited about both my past and my future. And the one that really confuses a lot of people that get to know me real well; my cynicism despite my optimism. I can find good in almost any situation. Almost, there’s been a few times where its been hard for me but even then time offers a little insight into how God’s plan worked itself out like it was supposed to. But still, my belief in the power of an individual is weak at best. Everyone can't make a noticeable difference in the world. It’s unrealistically idealistic in a planet filled with billions of people to think that. Most people, like extras in a movie, are going to not matter much and chances are both you and I are in that number. Just like in a play not everyone can be the star. People are so eager for self-importance that the thought that, on the global scale, they're completely insignificant is crushing. Your vote, your recycled bottle, your donation, your opinion; none of them matter on a global or even national level.
- Very cynical I know, but it doesn't mean any of that is meaningless. Instead of the big picture I think people need to focus more on the medium picture; on the individuals that you do touch with your life. People sometimes need to pull their heads out of the clouds before they can really do any good. Your family, your friends, the girl you love, those that look up to you and learn from you. These people are where meaning lies. They represent your legacy and only through them can you become as big as your potential.
- This blog is a great example of my whole point. I don't have a huge readership, I know this. I'd be kind of creeped out if I did considering a lot of the content is personal issues with little effect on many others. But there are those who do; 20 or so people I can think of off the top of my head who have told me they read it somewhat consistently. And even though none of the things I write will be headlines, I don’t need them to be. As long as it adds something to your day I'm satisfied. My effect on history won't be huge, but if it’s positive I consider it all worth it.
- So, in a winding, round about, tangential kind of way, I guess what I'm trying to say is thank you. If you're in my life you matter to me, probably more than you know.
- I miss Kimbre a lot. She’s camping with her upward-bound kids in Rocky Mountain National Park. No cell phone service there but I got to talk to her when I got off of work while she was in town which was really nice. My count up clock on my desktop says that we've been dating 200 days today. There’s no particular meaning to this landmark beyond just putting in perspective how far we've come. Things are going good with her. I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time.
- I don't understand myself sometimes. I'm an awkward mix of a lot of seemingly contradictory things. Social nature with loner tendencies. Love of faith and love of science. Excited about both my past and my future. And the one that really confuses a lot of people that get to know me real well; my cynicism despite my optimism. I can find good in almost any situation. Almost, there’s been a few times where its been hard for me but even then time offers a little insight into how God’s plan worked itself out like it was supposed to. But still, my belief in the power of an individual is weak at best. Everyone can't make a noticeable difference in the world. It’s unrealistically idealistic in a planet filled with billions of people to think that. Most people, like extras in a movie, are going to not matter much and chances are both you and I are in that number. Just like in a play not everyone can be the star. People are so eager for self-importance that the thought that, on the global scale, they're completely insignificant is crushing. Your vote, your recycled bottle, your donation, your opinion; none of them matter on a global or even national level.
- Very cynical I know, but it doesn't mean any of that is meaningless. Instead of the big picture I think people need to focus more on the medium picture; on the individuals that you do touch with your life. People sometimes need to pull their heads out of the clouds before they can really do any good. Your family, your friends, the girl you love, those that look up to you and learn from you. These people are where meaning lies. They represent your legacy and only through them can you become as big as your potential.
- This blog is a great example of my whole point. I don't have a huge readership, I know this. I'd be kind of creeped out if I did considering a lot of the content is personal issues with little effect on many others. But there are those who do; 20 or so people I can think of off the top of my head who have told me they read it somewhat consistently. And even though none of the things I write will be headlines, I don’t need them to be. As long as it adds something to your day I'm satisfied. My effect on history won't be huge, but if it’s positive I consider it all worth it.
- So, in a winding, round about, tangential kind of way, I guess what I'm trying to say is thank you. If you're in my life you matter to me, probably more than you know.
posted by Jay | 7:49 PM
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