Quiet in My Mind
- Tomorrow is my last day of school. That feels so wierd. I don't know what to do with myself. Its like someone hit me with a brick and I can't focus on anything. It makes me want to cry. I don't know why, but I can't stand it. Life goes too fast. Its like over the last couple of years my eyes got opened to the opportunities of everything I could ever want. I lose an attitude and gain the world. Now I can't get enough. Time is cruel. I'm gonna miss high school. People say college years are the best in life but they are gonna have to be pretty dang good to beat
- I've got about half of John Mayer songs learned on guitar. I'm learning so much in terms of my own style and guitar technique from him. If theres anything that can distract me its playing his jazz-fusion outside on a nice day like this. I love guitar. Its like my personal social hole where I can just think and relax.
- Kristen's leaving in two weeks. I tried so hard not to get attached. Didn't work. Even my parents love her. She sat with them while I blew my song at the jazz song tonight. We've almost gotten all the way through season 1 of Alias.
- Oh man. Not enough time. 3 months left with these people I love. Then comes the next step in life. I'll be ready. I gotta do some soul searching. Responsibilty takes a lot out of you. Especially when living selfishly is all you know. Thats all I know. God's got other things for me in my life. I can't stay idle forever. MT this summer will help me focus. I need focus.
Thats it.
- I've got about half of John Mayer songs learned on guitar. I'm learning so much in terms of my own style and guitar technique from him. If theres anything that can distract me its playing his jazz-fusion outside on a nice day like this. I love guitar. Its like my personal social hole where I can just think and relax.
- Kristen's leaving in two weeks. I tried so hard not to get attached. Didn't work. Even my parents love her. She sat with them while I blew my song at the jazz song tonight. We've almost gotten all the way through season 1 of Alias.
- Oh man. Not enough time. 3 months left with these people I love. Then comes the next step in life. I'll be ready. I gotta do some soul searching. Responsibilty takes a lot out of you. Especially when living selfishly is all you know. Thats all I know. God's got other things for me in my life. I can't stay idle forever. MT this summer will help me focus. I need focus.
Thats it.
posted by Jay | 11:10 PM
6 Comments:
If there's anything I've learned, it's not to depend on Mission Trip to be the thing that gets you focused. You may be setting yourself up for disappointment. I think MT is going to be more amazing than usual this year, but be careful relying on that for any kind of personal growth.
Just thought I'd warn you. I've been forced into a false sense of focus too many times to count...
Yeah, your probably right. It'll be good to get away nontheless.
Lol you sound so forlorn. I didn't mean to crush your dreams! It WILL be a good trip, I promise.
Haha, dreams are still intact. Yeah, it will be.
Jay, this is Jodi. You should download the song "All the Days" by FM Static. Helped me a lot when I went away to college.
I don't usually read, but I'm bored today. Hope you don't care.
Naw I don't mind. I don't put anything to personal seeing as its a public journal. Thanks about the song to. I'll check it out.
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