Open

- I see my window for opportunity. Its there, and its as flawless as whatever I hope to get out of this. We'll see I guess. Kind of an unusal situation. I don't know.

- What I do know is that tonight was fun. One of my teams put up our third consecutive 40+ point in coed flag football by beating the best team in our division and claiming a playoff spot with a 3-0 record. My other team lost again due to a mediocre quarterbacking, a chick who kicked me in the balls on a blitz, and a guy that we all just called, "the hoss". Cause thats what he was. Fastest kid alive. It was all good though. We had a good time anyway. Or at least I did.

- No class tomorrow too which means I get all morning to play Halo 3 before I go do some work assessing research videos and lead the study later that night. And finally I think I'm going home this weekend for the first time in weeks. I'm looking foward to that.

- Thats about it. I'm going to rest my weary body for now.

Living for the Weekends

- I'm sorry, I suppose I owe an update after the last post. The girl that picked up my phone on the ground where it fell out of my pocket called my roomate Jeff the next day. We met up, I got my phone back, and I learned my lesson. I make sure I have it everytime I go anywhere now and again when I leave.

- Overall life is amazing though. I went to IHOP with Jeff, Andrea, and Cliff this morning and in between the crisp fall air on the drive over, the juicy goodness of my steak and eggs, and the realization that I have one of the best group friends in the world, I just couldn't help but sit there and think how lucky I am. These are definantly the best days of my life.

I'd lose my head if it wasn't screwed on so tight.

- If you ever want a way to make me die from frustration and stress, all you have to do is hide things from me. I had a 15 minute window yesterday between when I got out of my accounting class and figured out that I had misplaced my phone. I literally spent two hours last night after I got out of my STRETCH meeting tearing apart my room, house, and retracing my steps all the way back to my accounting class with no luck in finding it. I get OCD when I can't find someting dumb like the TV remote and still I can't sit still until I find it. Now imagine what its like for me to lose my phone. I'm in hell that I can't find it. My only hope before I need to just write it off as lost and get a new one is that maybe I left it in accounting and my teacher picked it up. Chances aren't good but I guess theres still a chance. The timing of losing it could hardly be worse.

- Oh well, there are worse things I suppose. I run my first of two assessment center nights tonight. I'm kinda nervous but everyone else that has done it hasn't really had any major problems knock on wood.

- Other than that I guess I don't really have anything to write about out of the ordinary. I'm staying busy. Intramural flag football is my mid week savior. There are things I have to enjoy about both of my teams even though one is really good and the other got mercy ruled.

- Overall, just tell me if you see my phone.

Iridescent

- I was having trouble sleeping last night. I was just flat out restless and unable to get comfortable so I got up, played a little guitar to try and quiet my mind a bit. After getting a glass of water and putting the guitar away I laid back down on my bed and as soon as I did one powerful image from my childhood flooded my mind as if someone forced it on me:

- It was from a time as a kid when I was living in Lubbock late in a summer afternoon. I'd been playing in the front yard all day with my sisters throwing those big round sycamore seeds at each other after loosening up the stems so they'd explode when they hit someone. Everyone had long since gone inside at this point and for some reason I was crawling around in the white Chevy we owned at the time. I discovered the seat reclined and decided to play astronaut and pretend I was taking off in a spaceship to the moon by reclining the seat really far back and staring out the window at the sky. Right as I did that how tiring the day was hit me and I just laid there watching the leaves on the sycamore tree wave in the wind as the late afternoon sun danced in between them and lit each one up like a dull green light.

- The memory relaxed me and allowed me to finally fall asleep after three hours of tossing and turning.

- When I woke up this morning a bit of me became really depressed. If I can take the time as a little kid to stop and recognize the simple pleasure of summer afternoon, why do I have so much trouble slowing down as a young adult? Thinking about my day today, from nine o' clock when I first rolled into my class to just now when I finished studying I was literally running from here to there barely taking time to eat lunch much less enjoy one the first crisp fall days of the season. And as much as I got done today, it all feels like a waste. I guess I don't know what I expect of myself. I really can't afford to slow down without letting things slip but real life; like real life to me was sitting in the reclined seat of that Chevy watching the day and really realizing the miracle of everything around me. I started a sketchbook a couple weeks ago to try and get those moments down before I let them slip into nothing.

- It all goes so fast sometimes, I just don't want to miss any of it.

Developmental Assessment Center Research Assistant

- Yesterday I took a big step toward being an adult as opposed to a college kid. A psychologist working on a project in an accessment center came into my first class looking for research assistants and before I knew it I was accepted for the spot. My job in the project will be to observe and record the behaviors of freshman psych majors in various activities, organize the data, then provide reports about things they should do to make them more attractive to employers in the workforce. Resume wise, its gold because that is more or less what I want to do; work in an assessment center for buisnesses in a consulting spot. This research position is something which was normally only offered to seniors so I felt pretty honored to get it, but looking over the training schedule I noticed the second training session on Saturday fell right on and over game time against 12 ranked Cal. I don't miss football games but I guess I'm going to have to suck it up. You gotta get to a point eventually, I suppose, where college becomes more than a four year party and turns into a stepping stone to a career. This research project should be a lot of fun anyway so I guess it won't be so bad.

-I've been keeping real busy recently. The RA spot is worth 3 credits and to keep my class load below 20+ credits this semester I had to drop World Philosophy. I hope I'm able to pick it up next semester because I've already put in around 2o or more hours of reading and study time for that class. Beyond class though I can find only one or two hours of pure free time a day. At the level its at, though, I actually enjoy it. I'm staying active which is good for me mentally and I'm still finding time for fun. My last couple weekends have been some of the best I've had at CSU and I've found that golden ballance between hanging out with my best friends and meeting new people.

- All in all so far this has had the makings of a great semester and it doesn't show any signs of letting up anytime soon. Here's to September and all its giving me.

Sunshine

- So another week is in the books and the school year's in full swing. The weather's been hot which has its perks. I can't remember the last time I wore shoes instead of my hawaiian flip flops. Still I'm ready for hoodie weather. There's just something about the feeling of a warm sweatshirt on a cold day that is safe and comforatable.

- The week itself was fairly thick. I'm glad that I have tomorrow off because Mondays are my longest day and last Monday was kinda tough to get through.

- The weekend was a good time though. We lost to CU in a heartbreaker which really sucked but the social part of the game before, during, and after was the most fun I've had so far this year. After the game we drove to Morrison, CO where Red Rocks is to check on Jeff's car which got locked in a local school during a concert there Friday night. It was kind of a spur of the moment thing and we didn't end up getting the car back yet but the trip reminded me of how beautiful Colorado is and renewed my desire to explore a bit. I also got to burn Atmosphere's new EP from Dustin's friend we picked up in Morrison. I had one of those life is beautiful moments this morning thanks to that EP. I had just stopped at a gas station and picked up a raspberry slush. (Which, by the way, stained my mouth and probably my intestines with a pleasant dark blue for the rest of the day.) I was sucking that puppy down, windows open, getting hugged by the sunshine and breeze. I popped in the CD and listened to the first track, Sunshine which talked about a guy recovering from a hangover who stepped outside and was so overwhelmed by the beautiful day that he forgot how hung over he was. I wasn't hung over or anything but I knew how he was feeling. I reclined my seat and slowed down my driving a bit and just took the moment to enjoy the fact that I'm alive.

- My iTunes tonight must be on awesome music only mode because this is the tenth or so good song in a row its played.

- The next two weeks or so are promising to be interesting. Probably fairly academically difficult but I have quite a few opportunities in front of me. Its going to be fun seeing how they develope.

When the time is right

I swear my day will come

The sweetest storm will come through this town and carry us out